Every Messy Chapter
by skylar.s
Summary: This is the story of How Barney and Robin got married. "I love our story. Sure it's messy, but it's the story that got us here." It is told over the course of the show but begins during 2.18 Moving Day. Please give it a chance and let me know what episodes I should write about next.
1. Chapter 1

"Holy crap! You're beautiful!" Barney said, his face caught in disbelief as he stared at Robin. She looked surprised for a second, but then she smiled at him and nothing else mattered. Then the moment was over and she looked away at Ted who, busy packing, hadn't noticed a thing.

_ "Why did I say that?!" _Barney thought, trying to hide his panic. He should be happy that Ted and Robin were moving in together, but it honestly felt like he was losing both of them. Ever since they got together Barney had lost Ted, his wingman, leaving him to pick up chicks and play laser tag alone. Honestly, even when Ted was single, he hadn't done those things with him too often, but it was a loss just the same. And then there was Robin… Oh shit! She was still waiting for him to talk.

"Alright then. How will you feel when you can't sneak the occasional cigarette?" Barney quickly asked Robin, trying to sound like himself and not like the total Ted Mosby he'd pulled only seconds ago.

Ted scoffed. "Come on. Robin doesn't smoke," he said. Robin's eyes lowered when Ted looked at her questioningly. As they bickered Barney's mind wandered.

There was so much that Ted didn't know about Robin, like how she loved cigarettes, but wasn't unwilling to have a cigar on a special occasion. The fact that she owned multiple guns and had to cancel her subscription to _Guns and Ammo_ now that Ted was moving in. He'd never seen how badass she was when she played laser tag or how beautiful she looked wearing a suit.

Barney remembered the time when Robin had been his wingman. She'd shown up to the cigar bar in a suit and from that moment he had known that night was going to be legen[wait-for-it]dary. And it was, until she stopped him from birthday suiting up and told him that she liked Ted. Barney had been shut down quite a few times before then, but that time it hurt and he still didn't know why.

Now here he was, almost a year later, still thinking about that woman as she was about to let his best bro move in with her. Did he think that Ted and Robin were good together? Yes. But he knew that they had an expiration date. Ted wanted marriage and kids and Robin wanted to follow her career wherever it took her. If they ended up getting married, one of them would have to give up their dreams and they would never be happy. Barney snapped out of it when Robin stormed into the kitchen.

Now that he and Ted were alone, he could focus on his original goal. This was about convincing Ted not to make the biggest mistake of his life. This was not about Robin at all. The fact that he was losing Ted as his wingman was what was making him upset. That had to be it. Deep inside Barney knew that it wasn't, but that didn't matter anymore. Barney had to think of something to keep the two people he cared about most from making this mistake.

"Ted, I can't let you do this," Barney started to say genuinely before Ted interrupted.

"Come on. This is happening, so instead of fighting it, why don't you just help?" Ted asked wearily and Barney knew he wouldn't be able to change his mind.

Robin walked into the room with a box and suddenly, Barney had a legendary idea.

"You want me to help?" Barney said as he grabbed the box out of Robin's hands and the keys to the moving van off of the wall. "Ok Ted. I'll help you."

Barney glanced at Robin before walking out of the apartment and he knew what he had to do.


	2. Chapter 2

Author's Note

The next few chapters are set in 3.16 Sandcastles in the Sand. This chapter is based on Robin after her break up with Simon but before Barney shows up at the bar. There's not as much action but I needed this to lead up to what will happen next chapter. Enjoy !

One by one the gang left MacLaren's Pub. It started with Lily and Michelle, who were caught in what Marshall liked to call Revertigo, which caused them to act like slang talking 16-year-old girls. Next was Marshall, and after a few attempts of conversation, Ted walked out of the bar leaving Robin alone with her thoughts.

As Ted finally left, Robin's smile faded as she forced down some scotch and tried to erase the horrible day from her memory. Why had she been such an idiot and let Simon back in her life? She didn't understand what her friends meant about him being unattractive but if they thought that is what would help her get over him, they were wrong. Simon had won the break up. But that wasn't the part that upset her.

Robin thought that if she could come to New York City and become a successful news anchor, then she would prove everyone who doubted her in Canada wrong. She thought she was happy with her life, but it hadn't been enough to keep Simon from leaving her for Louise Marsh… again.

Robin had come such a long way from when she was 16. Why couldn't Simon see that? Robin thought back to when her father forced her to look and act like a boy. She was miserable then and becoming Robin Sparkles seemed like the perfect escape. It wasn't. The blonde hair and bedazzled jean jacket made her feel like she was even further from finding the real Robin Scherbatsky.

As soon as she was out of college, Robin moved to the Big Apple to chase her dream of becoming a journalist. It was in the city that she really discovered herself so by the time she met her friends, she thought she had her life figured out. Robin's plan was to become a successful journalist, to travel around the world and everything else would happen when it happened. She wasn't like Ted who planned out his entire life. When it came to whom she would end up with, Robin wanted to be surprised. One thing she did know for certain was that kids never had been and never would be part of the plan.

The first strong relationship Robin had ever had was when she made friends with Ted, Lily, Marshall and Barney who loved her for who she really was, even if Ted sometimes tried to change her views on marriage and kids. She was really grateful to have them in her life and thought of them as her family.

After she and Ted broke up, Robin started to lose herself again, trying to keep things the way they were in Argentina. It was Barney who snapped her out of it and begged her to go back to being the Robin Scherbatsky they knew and loved. Since then, she had felt confident in the woman she had become, but this changed everything.

Robin felt exactly how she had felt when she was 16 and Simon left her for the first time. She was broken. Last time it had been because she thought she was in love with him. This time she couldn't explain why she was struggling to keep tears from running down her face in the middle of the bar. She thought that she was stronger than that but right now, she was empty. The kind of emptiness that scotch can't begin to fill. Robin didn't even taste it anymore but she was able to get another large sip down as Barney slid into the booth across from her.


	3. Chapter 3

"Alright I can't find your video," Barney said as he slid into the booth across from Robin. He was pissed. The past three days had been a living hell of search engines and overseas phone calls. And what did he have to show for it? Nothing. Why did he even care this much about a stupid video? He didn't want to see Robin together with Simon ten years ago anymore than he wanted to see them together now. Thank god Simon wasn't at the bar. Barney couldn't stand that guy.

It was just him and Robin, which meant that Barney could tell her about how awful the past three days had been for him because of her. "I wasted three days tr…" then Barney really looked at Robin. Her nose was slightly red and she was trying to quickly wipe her eyes. These were all signs of a break up. If it were just some random girl at the bar he would have found an awesome way to get her to his apartment, but he could never do that to Robin. She was his bro and his job as her bro was to make sure that she was alright. "What's the matter?" He finally asked.

After a moment of hesitation Robin said, "Simon dumped me in his van after the show." She tried to make it sound as if it was nothing, but her voice was strained.

"Yeah. Robin, that was like ten years ago," Barney responded. He didn't mean to sound insensitive but he was extremely confused. Why would Robin be so upset over something that happened that long ago?

"No. Tonight," Robin said, with a sad smile. They both knew how ironic the situation was and without thinking Barney started to laugh. Robin's smile faded. She struggled for a moment before she broke down in tears.

"Oh… Come here," he said smiling empathetically as he climbed across the booth to sit next to her. She rested her head on his shoulders and cried. Barney held her and he didn't mind that her tears were getting on his suit, or that he'd miss out on any hot chicks in the bar that night. He looked down at Robin and he didn't even care about the video anymore. Barney had never seen her this shaken.

He was surprised. Robin was the most confident woman that he'd ever met and here she was crying over some loser. What had she even seen in that idiot? He looked like the hobo on the street across from MacLaren's. Simon had no right to make Robin feel small but, Barney knew that no amount of horrible things he could say about Simon would change the way she was feeling. He was sure the rest of the gang had already tried that. Barney knew the only way to truly help Robin was to be there for her and help her realize how awesome she really is.

After a few minutes Robin looked up and talked about how seeing Simon again made her miss being young and vulnerable. "I wanted to be 16 again," she said, trying not to break down again.

"Robin," Barney finally said. "That is the stupidest thing I have ever heard come out of your mouth." Robin laughed as she realized that it was true. "I have watched your first Robin Sparkles video a thousand times," Barney admitted. He really had and he honestly didn't know why. It was one of the worst videos he had ever seen and the song was always stuck in his head. "And its not because I'm proud of you as a friend. It's because you were totally, totally lame back then."

Robin laughed again, but Barney saw that she was still hurting. Didn't she realize how far she had come? Beyond ditching the blonde hair and bedazzled jean jacket, Robin had really gone such a long way to becoming the beautiful, independent woman she was now and Barney needed her to see that. "But now, come on! You are the most awesome person I have ever known," Barney said. And he meant it.

Barney had said, "I love you" to hundreds of girls to get laid. He said it so much that the phrase barely meant anything to him anymore. This was different. Barney realized the weight of what he had just said and it scared him. He searched Robin's face for an answer but she was just as confused as he was. "Well, second most awesome," Barney quickly added. He immediately hated himself for being such a coward.

The moment was over and as Robin wiped away the last of her tears she sarcastically said, "Right. Of course the first being you."

"No… no," Barney said, returning to his cocky mannerisms that he knew would make Robin smile. "The first being this guy who lives in… the mirror! What up!" She laughed and even though he'd missed his chance, Barney knew that tonight had been worth it. Now he would probably just go home and sleep. He wasn't in the mood to pick up chicks and Ted definitely wouldn't want to hang out because he was dating Stella.

"What I'm saying is that you are way more awesome than Simon will ever be," Barney said warmly. Then he took his arm from around Robin and started scooting out of the booth. Robin would be fine. Seeing her here tonight was just so confusing for him and he needed to go home before he messed things up for their friendship. He had no explanation other than that he needed her in his life, even if it was only as a friend.

"Barney," Robin said, putting her hand on his arm to stop him. After a pause she finally asked, "Do you want to go back to my place?"

Barney was surprised. "Your place?" he asked. He knew what that usually meant, but this was Robin and not some out of town skank. Robin smiled before whispering in his ear. Barney's eyes widened and he felt his jaw drop. Tonight was going to be legen… wait for it…


	4. Chapter 4

As they slid into the cab, Robin's heart pounded. What was she doing taking home Barney Stinson? They'd both been drinking, she was vulnerable after Simon and this just was not a good idea. She didn't like Barney in that way at all with his stupid suits, lame catch phrases, dorky smile and deep blue eyes. Crap! Robin had to get out of the cab.

They were already on their way. "Goddammit!" Robin cursed under her breath. Barney turned to her and raised his eyebrow questioningly. He was such a dork. How did he even get women to sleep with him? Robin felt sorry for every single, self-loathing idiot that ended up waking next to him, but she knew that she would never be one of them.

The two of them sat in awkward silence in the cab. Robin looked out her window at the bright lights of New York City. She tried to not think about anything. Not about how Simon had dumped her again behind his van after the show. Not about how out of all people, Barney had been the one to make her feel better, even if it was just for a little while, and definitely not about how she was taking him home to watch her second Robin Sparkles video.

Why was she crying? Robin quickly bit her lip and dried her eyes. Barney had already seen her cry today and she could not humiliate herself like that again. She had to tell him to come over some other time. This was just too much for her to handle without falling apart again. Robin turned around and saw that Barney was looking straight back at her, his eyes full of concern. Robin said, "I'm sorry, I don't think we can do this tonight."

Barney eyes flashed with disappointment before he casually shook it off. "That's alright Scherbatsky," he said. "I can just go to the bar by my place and pick up an 8, or at this time of night, two 4's! What up!" Robin tried to force a smile, but it quickly faded.

"Hey, are you ok?" Barney asked as he clasped her hand in his. His eyes stared straight into hers and Robin wanted more than anything to be able to say yes.

Just then the cab driver pulled in front of Robin's apartment. Robin gently let go of Barney's hand and got out of the cab. She looked back in at Barney and he looked as beaten down as she did. Robin knew that after he searched for three days, watching the video must have meant a lot to him. Barney finally looked up at her and said, "See you tomorrow Robin." She nodded dumbly as she closed the door.

Robin started walking towards her apartment as she heard the cab drive away. This is how she handled things in her life, alone. There was nothing wrong with that, but it got really lonely sometimes. Barney may be a womanizing dork, but he made her laugh and a night laughing with him at her stupid video would be a million times better than laying in her bed crying her eyes out. What had she been thinking? She needed him here tonight.

Robin pulled out her cellphone and found his number. As she waited for him to reply she worried. What if he was mad at her for not being able to make up her mind? What if he was already hooking up with some chick? It had been under a minute, but with Barney, who knew? What if…

"Go for Barney," he said. Robin's heart started beating uncontrollably.

"Hey Barney, it's Robin," she said trying to stay calm. "I know you were just here but…" and the line went dead.

He'd hung up on her. Robin checked the screen, only to find it true. She sunk down on the steps of her apartment building and looked out at the street. She couldn't cry anymore. Earlier at the bar, Robin had been broken. Now, she was just empty.

Suddenly, Robin saw a small shape running around the corner. Was that Barney? As he got closer she started to smile and laugh in disbelief. When he got to the apartment he was out of breath, but he grinned boyishly as he sat down next to Robin.

"That has to be some sort of record," he said panting. Robin laughed. "Thank you," she said as she hugged him. It felt so nice just to be there in that moment. It made her forget about everything else. When his breathing slowed down, Robin pulled back and stood up. "Let's go upstairs," she said. "There's something I've been meaning to show you."


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N Finally the kiss scene. I'm sorry that it has taken so long but I will try to get the next part in as soon as possible. Please review!**

"So… do I just put it in?" Barney asked. He and Robin had been sitting on her couch in awkward silence for five minutes.

"Why not," she finally replied. Barney quickly inserted the tape and sat back to watch the video he had searched 3 days for.

It was legendary! This Robin Sparkles love ballad was better than anything he could have hoped for. He was sure that they could make it into a tampon commercial with a little editing.

It was over too soon and Barney knew that he would have to leave but he didn't want to and it made no sense to him. He'd seen the video, and it was everything he had wanted and more, but for some reason he couldn't imagine leaving now.

As the music faded out, Robin looked at Barney questioningly. "Can we watch it again?" Barney asked hesitantly. Robin laughed as she rewinded it. She seemed to be feeling better and a small part of Barney was proud that it was because of him.

They watched it again and again and again, but each time Barney watched a little less. Why would he pay attention to the lame 16 year old Robin with the real thing sitting right next to him? She was so much more now than she could have dreamed to be back then and she still couldn't see it. "Do you see how lame you were back then?" Barney asked motioning to the sobbing Robin on the TV.

She smiled but Barney could tell Robin was still hurting a little. "Hey," he said as he reached for her hand. "I'm sorry." Robin squeezed his hand before letting go. He knew that she was trying to prove that she was strong. Barney admired that about her. Robin was different than the other girls.

"Sorry about what? You're not the one who dumped me," Robin said casually before turning her focus to the TV. She started laughing as she watched her 16 year old self sink to her knees in despair. Barney thought that she looked the most beautiful when she was laughing. He'd noticed it in the bar several times before but there was something special about tonight. She had opened herself up to him and Robin rarely did that to anyone. Maybe he had a chance tonight.

"I'm sorry about this," he said. And he truly was because he knew that this could possibly ruin their friendship forever. What if she didn't feel the same way… and what if she did?

Puzzled, Robin turned to Barney and he caught her lips in a kiss. She pulled away, her eyes full of shock. Barney grimaced. He should have known that this would never happen. Robin knew about the awful things he had done to women and probably thought that he was a disgusting pervert. "I'm sorry. I'm really sorry. Oh god! I'm…"

Before he could finish, Robin leaned in and kissed him tenderly. Barney responded as the shock faded. He tried to be gentle because he couldn't risk scaring her off. He didn't want this moment to end.

But it did and was replaced by a new one as Robin deepened the kiss, slipping her tongue into his mouth. She tasted like scotch in a really amazing way. He grabbed her face as he breathed her in, forgetting every other girl he'd ever kissed.

The last thing Barney remembered was Robin pulling him closer with her hands around his tie. There was something about her that enveloped him and he didn't think about the song still playing in the back round or what would happen in the morning. This moment was all that mattered.


	6. Chapter 6

Robin woke up relaxed and content. It was a Sunday so she didn't have to work and she could feel the sunlight hitting her face. She yawned and stretched out her arms, hitting the sleeping form beside her. Robin, confused, lifted up the blankets and saw that they both were naked. From what she could see, it must have been a pretty good night, but who the hell was this guy? Robin nudged his shoulders, trying to keep herself covered.

She looked around at her room and saw a suit folded up on her chair and a tie around her headboard. "_That's funny," _Robin thought. "_This guy has a grey suit just like Barney's." _The mysterious guy still wasn't awake. His face was turned from her, but Robin could tell that his hair was blonde. "_Oh god no," _Robin grimaced as her tired mind put the pieces together. Robin felt sick just looking at the sleeping man so she had to put her mind at ease and find out who he was. She finally mustered the courage and used the trick that Lily had taught her, flicking him against the nose.

"What the hell was…" Barney started angrily as he woke up, but then he saw Robin and his eyes grew wide. Seeing his face, Robin's heart dropped into her stomach as she suddenly remembered everything that had happened that night. The worst part was that she had enjoyed it. She had felt something and it had been for him. Barney Stinson, the womanizing psychopath who was friends with her ex. Part of Robin wanted to throw up and part of Robin wanted to feel his lips one more time. She could tell that Barney was still processing so she lay in awkward silence for what felt like hours.

Finally Barney said, "Shit!" and threw his face down onto the pillow. A few minutes later he turned around ready to talk to Robin and she asked, "What do you usually do after these things?"

Barney realized what Robin thought this was, a drunken hook up that he had purposely orchestrated to sleep with her. Maybe that was all that it had been, he actually hoped so or else that would mean that he had felt something last night. There was no good way to fix this so Barney decided to just play along. "In my experience I usually make up a story and then I leave," he said.

"And then you go to the bar and tell your good friend Robin who wonders, who is this sad, self loathing idiot who climbed into bed with Barney Stinson?" Robin said as she watched Barney's eyes grow empty. She hated hurting him like this but he deserved it for making her feel powerless over her own life. "You usually say that out loud," Barney replied knowing that whatever this was would never happen again.

Then Barney brought up Ted and Robin felt awful. She possibly had just ruined their friendship all because of how stupid she had been. The room felt like it was shrinking. The air was getting thick and she needed to get out of here and away from Barney. She reached for her robe as she said, "Ok here's the deal Barney. The second my feet touch the ground this never happened." Before she got up, Barney did some dorky thing about looking at her boobs one last time. If the situation were different , Robin would have laughed but she could feel the vomit coming up her throat. She needed to leave now.

As she stood up Barney said, "Hey Robin," she looked towards him hoping for him to say something that could get them out of this mess, something to make her feel better about herself, but instead he said, "Guess who banged the chick from Metro News One last night?" He offered her a high five, which she awkwardly accepted before finally going into the bathroom.

Barney heard the shower start and he put his head into his hands. He had screwed up bad this time and if Robin thought that he could just forget, then she was wrong. How could he go back to being her friend if he still remembered the taste of her lips and the smell of her skin. He got up and started putting on his clothes. It was obvious that she didn't care about him at all. She seemed disgusted to wake up next to him. As he left the apartment Barney realized that he couldn't blame her for that at all.

Robin closed the bathroom door and turned on the shower so Barney wouldn't hear her throw up. Her head was spinning as she kneeled down by the toilet but when she tried, nothing came out. She wanted so badly for these feelings to go away, to forget last night and to move on but it wasn't working. When she heard the apartment door close, Robin finally let the tears run down her face, smearing last night's makeup. That was a night she would have done anything to change, but in the back of her mind she realized that she wouldn't change a thing.


End file.
